Time Out: Controlling Your ‘Mommy’ Anger

by | Jul 21, 2016 | Woman

OK, so I don’t really know what’s up with the craze over the game Angry Birds, and please don’t try explaining it to me, either. I work on a “need to know” basis, and I don’t really feel that understanding the attraction to that game qualifies.

But I do know about angry moms – because I was am one.

I’m not talking about the “losing your temper once in a while” type, either. I’m talking the “stuffing it ’til you explode” type … and while I’m not proud of that, it has given me a very generous perspective towards moms who lose it.

A while back I read a post from Ruthie Gray, of RearReleaseRegroup.com, about anger. This is a woman who has walked a similar road to mine in terms of experiencing, and then coming to terms with, that explosive “mommy anger.”

Yet I felt a little embarrassed reading her article because it hit a little too close to home. Kinda like when you’re sitting in church or listening to a speaker, and you could swear they were just in your kitchen last night. Or they were listening in after the kids got home from school a few days ago and you blew it.

It brought me back to the episode that first revealed to me that I even had a problem. My oldest was about 2 years old, and our second child was a newborn. As you can well imagine, exhaustion had set in, and that’s never good, right? So anyway, the baby had settled down to a nap, but my 2-year-old was just NOT wanting to have any part of nap time, and I could feel my temper growing in giant leaps. We were relatively new to the area, and so I had no one to talk to, nobody to call, no friends or family to take the kids while I grabbed a nap, and I. just. BLEW. IT!

I don’t even remember what I said, but I DO remember the face of my sweet little son as he just crumpled under my ire. Yuck. It was so NOT one of those parenting moments that you cherish or share proudly. But you can bet that it got me into high-gear to find help to keep that from happening again!

How I began to deal with my angry mom self

First things first: I prayed. Oh Lord, how I prayed! I prayed for me to have a softer heart towards my kiddos. I prayed for friends to help me deal with those episodes. I prayed that God would introduce me to older parents to become friends whose wisdom I could glean from. I prayed that He would lead me to books that might help me understand just why I was so angry. And as a way of showing His love for me, friends, He absolutely answered each and every one of those prayers.

Of course, receiving answers to those prayers alone doesn’t magically solve the problem. What followed were years of experiences working through tough situations with the kids, and developing vulnerability in meaningful friendships with ladies (mostly) who could mentor me and pray for me and pour into my new-mommy life.

But wait – there’s more!

Because even though God can indeed make all things new, we remain fragile and sinful human beings. So just about the time that I thought I was getting this “anger thing” under control, the toddler years arrived in our house…and then health issues with one of our children…and multiple major travel opportunities and moving our entire household…and then starting to homeschool…and the teen years…and well, I think you get the picture here, right?

Life continues to happen … and we continue to need God’s grace!

Similar to the diligent approach that many recovering addicts take about their illness—once an addict, always an addict—I realized I had to grab hold of that attitude, too. I learned over time that I need to always be diligent about my anger because that is a part of me. The Word never tells us to not be angry, just that we are not to use it as an excuse for sin.

And so since I’ve walked both the “mommy anger road” in the past, and am today on the journey at a much healthier place, I’m confident telling you about a free tool you can use in your own battle (and anyone who does experience this will attest to the fact that it is indeed a battle).

You Don’t Get a “Do Over” but You Can Get a Makeover

Sometimes, like I experienced so long ago, we know we need to do something about our anger, but we don’t know where to start! If you find yourself in that situation, let me encourage you to take advantage of Ruthie Gray’s free 5 day Mommy Anger Makeover Kit. Ruthie’s put together a devotional containing Scripture readings and assignments to help you refresh your devotional life and give you tools to begin dealing with your temper. Now I’m not sharing this as “the” answer, but I am sharing it as one fellow “angry mom” to another.

It’s a simple-yet-profound 5-day plan containing simple concepts, prayers, and Scripture “pillars” to help you grab a hold of and work out the roots of your anger, and come up with a personal plan to keep you from sinning in your anger.

And it costs you not one red cent!

I’ve already downloaded and printed it out, and if you are needing a tool right now, and at a loss as to where to start, well then, my friend, maybe you should, too! (And if you do, look for me over in Ruthie’s private Facebook group, Mom’s Time Out. Guess the kiddos aren’t the only ones that need that either, right?)

If you’ve read to this point, I want to leave you with this thought: I’ll be praying for those of you who struggle with “mommy anger” and trusting that God will continue to hold you in the palm of His hand as your walk along in your journey.

Pat Fenner has been homeschooling her 5 children for 20 years, learning and changing her methods quite a bit during that time. Preparing for a soon-to-be empty nest, she shares what she’s learned and encourages others in the journey over at PatAndCandy.com. Join them over a cup of coffee and sign up to get useful and creative parenting and homeschooling “members-only” helps.


Stay up-to-date with current issues, Christian teachings, entertainment news, videos & more.

The latest breaking Christian news you need to know about as soon as it happens.

Prophetic messages from respected leaders & news of how God is moving throughout the world. 


Troy Black Shares A Message to Help You Fight For Faith Again

Troy Black Shares A Message to Help You Fight For Faith Again

Young, old, rich or poor—nobody is immune to the feeling of brokenness. Jesus' life, death and resurrection on earth is a constant reminder that death no longer has a sting. Fear and hopelessness lurk throughout the earth trying to find an opportune moment to consume...

Kevin Sorbo’s Transformative Encounter as a Teen with Billy Graham

Kevin Sorbo’s Transformative Encounter as a Teen with Billy Graham

Actor Kevin Sorbo is known today for his roles in faith-based movies, like "God's Not Dead" and "Left Behind," but the iconic "Hercules" star's Christian roots took form at an early age. Sorbo recently told CBN's "Faith vs. Culture" he first read the prophetic book of...

7 Forms of Functional Cessationism

7 Forms of Functional Cessationism

In this article, cessationism refers to the doctrine, practice or belief that the ascension ministry gifts and the manifestations of the Holy Spirit ceased with the early church and do not function in the present church age (Eph. 4:11-16; 1 Cor. 12: 4-11). The...

Practical Tips to Maximize Your Time

Practical Tips to Maximize Your Time

We all have the same amount of time—four hours a day, seven days a week. And the longer I live, the more I discover that time is too valuable for us to waste any of it. That’s why it is so important that we learn to live on purpose, for a purpose. The truth is if you...

Enter the Courts of Heaven with Rabbi Curt Landry

Enter the Courts of Heaven with Rabbi Curt Landry

This article was first released by Curt Landry Ministries. Note: This is the first of a two-part series of articles. When you enter heaven's courtroom to do spiritual warfare, you are asking that the will of God, what is written in His books, be released from heaven...

The Spiritual Awakening of Buffalo, New York

The Spiritual Awakening of Buffalo, New York

Monday night, Jan. 2, 2023, God drew our nation to prayer as Bills player Damar Hamlin experienced cardiac arrest on live tv. Could this have been the largest spontaneous prayer meeting in the history of our nation—beginning with players on the field, spreading to...


Mario Murillo: ‘What I Have Said About Kat Kerr and Robin Bullock Stands’

Perhaps you read my previous blog entitled "Mario, where have you been?" I went through a fiery ordeal before I obeyed God and wrote it. I thought, "Why should I wade into such controversy and incur...
Dr. Don Colbert: How This Every Day Ingredient is Killing Your Brain

Dr. Don Colbert: How This Every Day Ingredient is Killing Your Brain

Read Time: 4 Minutes 43 Seconds Of the many artificial sweeteners out there, such as aspartame, sucralose (Splenda), saccharin (Sugar Twin and Sweet’N Low) and neotame (NutraSweet), aspartame is one of the most common. How common? Aspartame is an ingredient in more...

Messianic Rabbi: The Problem with Paul

Messianic Rabbi: The Problem with Paul

Read Time: 3 Minutes 36 Seconds I cannot tell you the number of conversations that I have participated in, or the number of sermons or Bible studies I have heard, where someone made the statement, “The problem with Paul is…” and then the person made a definitive...

Pin It on Pinterest