As I talk with women, it seems that we all have a common battle in marriage.
It’s a desire we have to have our needs perceived and met without us having to communicate them. We feel appreciated, noticed, accepted and validated when someone sees our struggle and reaches out with a helping hand, a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear.
Somehow we feel that communicating this need invalidates our emotions.
And this works most times with our girlfriends.
But with our husband it rarely works.
What usually happens in marriage is, as our needs go unmet, our feelings get hurt. We feel unimportant, unnoticed and unappreciated.
As the tension rises, our husbands feel at a distinct disadvantage.
God didn’t create them with the same intuition with which He created women. Reading signals and trying to get them correct—while avoiding potential landmines that will result in tears—makes them feel intimidated and insecure.
As women, we can bring greater peace into our homes by laying down our right to have our needs met without communicating them, and we can allow our husbands to meet our needs—as they want to do, thereby avoiding tension in the home.
In the end, everyone’s needs are met and our home is a safe and joyful haven for all!
Rosilind Jukic, a Pacific Northwest native, is a missionary living in Croatia and married to her Bosnian hero. Together they live in the country with their 2 active boys where she enjoys fruity candles, good coffee and a hot cup of herbal tea on a blustery fall evening. Her passion for writing led her to author her best-selling book The Missional Handbook. At A Little R & R she encourages women to find contentment in what God created them to be. You can also find her at Missional Call where she shares her passion for local and global missions. She can also be found at these other places on a regular basis. You can follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Google +.
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