Feeling Lonely? There Are Really Only 2 Choices

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Shawn Akers

Many women’s lives are saturated with busyness, interactions, relationships, social media and the expectations of others. However, all the busyness in the world doesn’t guarantee that a woman will never be lonely.

Loneliness is simply feeling as if no one sincerely cares about you or is interested in your life beyond surface interactions. It is assuming that nobody desires to listen to your thoughts or quietly understand what is going on in the recesses of your heart.

If loneliness is not recognized and lovingly healed, it will certainly be the precursor to depression. And when loneliness and depression join forces in a woman’s life, it can be a lethal combination of poisonous warfare. Your spiritual enemy has a strategy for how to defeat you. Satan’s goal for your life is to keep you weary and exhausted every single day of your existence. He is wily and beguiling and knows exactly how to magnify the pangs of loneliness in a believer’s life. He can grip a woman’s heart with loneliness when she is also dealing with weariness, exhaustion, and fear.

However, there is power in God’s Word to fight every negative emotion and to dismantle the schemes and plans of your archenemy. The devil’s subtle whispers shout most loudly when we are alone.


“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you'” (Heb. 13:5, NIV).

You serve a God who will never leave you alone. You are not forsaken in any situation or at any moment in life. He is with you, which is a glorious relief! The enemy wants you to believe that you are alone, but according to the greatest book of truth in all of history, you always have someone by your side. The mournful ballad that the enemy croons over your life is “One Is the Loneliest Number.” Yet the love song that Jesus sings to a lonely daughter is “You’ll Never Walk Alone.” The biblical reality is that you are surrounded by God’s love and care every day of your life.

Jesus truly wants to be your closest friend, so feel free to talk to Him anytime or anywhere. Share your heart with Him and then listen for His loving response. When you begin to respond to Jesus as you would to a friend, your loneliness will slowly begin to ebb away.

In my seasons of loneliness, I have reminded myself numerous times that there are at least two ways to walk through the door to God’s undeniable presence: fellowship and worship. Matthew 18:20 teaches us that when believers are with each other, He is with them also. If you want to spend time with God, spend an evening with a group of people who love Him. God dwells where praise is full and strong! If you long for your loving Father to make Himself known and manifest in your life, then you should spend time worshipping Him. If you deal with loneliness, turn up the worship music and then lift your hands in the air because He is there. You are not alone!


We can also learn from the example of Jesus concerning loneliness in the life of a believer; we must observe what He did when He too was all alone. It seems to me that Jesus was in the habit of proactively being alone so He could spend time in prayer. I believe we should imitate everything Jesus chose to do during His time on earth, and if it was beneficial for Him to choose to be alone in order to pray, it will be beneficial for us to do the same.

What if God has wisely appointed you to a season of solitary living so you can grow closer to Him? What if you will never experience the true love of the Father unless you actually spend time with Him? There is a divine assignment with your name on it that loneliness is not able to erase.

While you are feeling alone, you can either alienate yourself, or you can fulfill the plan of God for your life. {eoa}

Carol McLeod is an author and popular speaker at women’s conferences and retreats, where she teaches the Word of God with great joy and enthusiasm. Carol encourages and empowers women with passionate and practical biblical messages mixed with her own special brand of hope and humor. She has written five books, including No More Ordinary, Holy Estrogen!, The Rooms of a Woman’s Heart and Defiant Joy! Her most recent book, Refined: Finding Joy in the Midst of the Fire, was released last August. Her teaching DVD The Rooms of a Woman’s Heart won the Telly Award, a prestigious industry award for excellence in religious programming. You can also listen to Carol’s A Jolt of Joy program daily on the Charisma Podcast Network. Connect with Carol at justjoyministries.com.


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