Are You a Control Freak?

by | Sep 17, 2014 | Woman

It was a typical Monday morning—6 a.m. came too quickly. My eyelids were half opened (or half shut) and my 2-and-a-half-year-old, who loves mornings, was valiantly yelling, “Mommy! Mommy! It’s coronation day!” (If you haven’t seen the movie Frozen, then this makes absolutely no sense.) My other vivacious daughter, who is 4 going on 14, came bounding down the hallway too.

I was able to get a few moments in the Word, scribbling something in my prayer journal with a few breaks in between to refill sippy cups, clean up spilled blueberries, and redirect one of the girls to their rooms for a timeout. I then took a timeout myself for a shower. And the day began . . .

Am I Cut Out for This?

Sometimes I wonder if I am really cut out to “manage” a home. I mean, like really have it together—not perfect by any means, but together. Orderly and peaceful.

In my mind, a well-managed home would look something like this:

I get a head start in the mornings before the kids, always one step ahead. Quiet time, coffee, a load of laundry, and a shower would have already been checked off the list. I would be refreshed and cheerful, ready to start the new day and cook a fine breakfast for the family, other than the usual popping a waffle in the toaster. Then, I would properly style my girls’ hair. We would find matching socks with ease. All of the necessary items for the day, such as a packed lunch, wipes, hand sanitizer, etc., would not be forgotten as we head out the door. Ah, sheer serenity.

But, reality for me on a typical day looks nothing like that. It’s frantic and unpredictable. I don’t think this is unique for me or for women in my generation. If Susanna Wesley had to pull her apron over her head for a few moments of peaceful prayer while her kids bounded about, then chaos is not a modern phenomenon in the home. Although, Susanna Wesley did have 19 children . . . but I digress.

Home Is a Place to Manage, Not Master

What I have learned is that managing the home is nothing like the scenario that I had built up in my mind. There are two specific passages in Scripture that address how women are to manage their households. (see 1 Tim. 5:14 and Titus 2:4–5)

I have learned that the home is not a place to master but to manage.

In 1 Timothy a direct statement to young widows (and wives, generally) is given: manage the home. Titus 2:4-5 addresses how older women are to teach the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be homemakers, etc. Many people have various opinions on these verses, and a few have taken a lot of liberty in explaining just what “managing the home” means. While I want to be careful not to add to Scripture in my limited knowledge of exactly what Paul meant, what I do know is this: manage is not control.

Life is unpredictable. Each day brings its own set of challenges and joys. I have learned that the home is not a place to master, but to manage.

My husband’s shirts may be pressed and hung up, but am I treating him with kindness and respect? Does he feel loved and cherished?

I may give my kids the Martha Stewart lunch of the year, but do they feel noticed and valued, or more like interruptions in my day?

Treasuring Your Family

I am learning that home management is not a parade but more like crop-plowing—it’s a process that occurs behind the scenes. It’s hard, dirty and slow to show the fruit of our labors, but it will be worth it in the end. Glorifying God through loving those in our care is at the heart of managing the home, though it’s often messy and full of mistakes. I think this is what Paul meant. We don’t direct our family like chess pieces but serve them as gifts from God to be treasured and loved.

So, on any given day you’ll see this work-in-progress managing my home while stumbling here and there—with some celebrations along the way. As Elsa in Frozen would say, “I’m learning to ‘let it go.'” This season, like all seasons of life, is finite. I hope to make the most of it by trying not to control everything. Instead, I will entrust it all to the One who is in control of it all. Will you trust Him with your home today?

Taken from Jenna Fleming’s blog post “Are You a Control Freak at Home?” on www.TrueWoman.com. Used with permission.

CHARISMA NEWSLETTERS

Stay up-to-date with current issues, Christian teachings, entertainment news, videos & more.

The latest breaking Christian news you need to know about as soon as it happens.

Prophetic messages from respected leaders & news of how God is moving throughout the world. 


MORE FROM CHARISMA

Is He a God of Wrath or a God of Love?

Is He a God of Wrath or a God of Love?

Do you think the God of the Old Testament is a God of wrath, and the God of the New Testament is a God of love? The truth is that God is the same throughout the entire Bible. His wrath and His love are revealed in both the Old and the New Testaments. So why, then, did...

How You Can Have a Perfect Heart

How You Can Have a Perfect Heart

Your heart is the most important part of you. It’s not only a physical organ that keeps your blood pumping, but when the Bible refers to the heart, it’s talking about who you really are. Each person has an inner and an outer life. There’s the person we show to...

How the FBI Raid on Mar-a-Lago Is Spiritual Warfare

How the FBI Raid on Mar-a-Lago Is Spiritual Warfare

It's been a few days since the FBI raided President Donald Trump's home in Mar-a-Lago, and the Biden Administration has yet to explain to the American people why they did what's never been done in American history—the government raiding the home of a former president....

How the Holy Spirit Can Restore Your True Sanity

How the Holy Spirit Can Restore Your True Sanity

Most of my life I tried to avoid one thing—being crazy or insane. When I was growing up my mother had emotional issues and saw a psychiatrist regularly. She was on medication which only seemed to make her mood swings worse. She had high highs, and low lows. When I...

Israel Prophecy: The Enemy is Stirring an Unimaginable Conflict

Israel Prophecy: The Enemy is Stirring an Unimaginable Conflict

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJFFqAgykmU A cease-fire between Israel and Palestinian militants took effect late Sunday in a bid to end nearly three days of violence that killed dozens of Palestinians and disrupted the lives of hundreds of thousands of Israelis,...

RECENT ARTICLES

Why Partial Obedience to God is Disobedience

My husband had a saying for our children growing up. “Partial obedience is disobedience.” He wanted them to understand that doing half the plan would not get them the full reward. Another reminder...
Kingdom Economics: Why is America Declining Spiritually So Quickly?

Kingdom Economics: Why is America Declining Spiritually So Quickly?

The Bureau of Labor Statistics released a surprisingly strong July Employment Report.  Total nonfarm employment was 528K (398K previously, 250K expected).  Private nonfarm employment was 471K (404K previously, 230K expected). The headline unemployment rate dropped to...

Can You Discern Spiritual Wind?

Can You Discern Spiritual Wind?

The wind is a funny thing. We do not know where it comes from nor where it goes. We cannot see it, but we can see and feel its effects. Wind can be gentle and refreshing, cold or hot, strong, and dangerous, and everything in between. When the wind blows, we must...

Messianic Rabbi: He That Has an Eye, Let Him Hear

Messianic Rabbi: He That Has an Eye, Let Him Hear

It is interesting that, as a Messianic rabbi the question I am asked most often by Christians is if I believe that they as Christians have to celebrate, or observe, the biblical Holy Days. They are usually asking about those days listed in Leviticus 23: Shabbat, Yom...

How the Holy Spirit Is Preparing America

How the Holy Spirit Is Preparing America

As the crackdown against Christianity in America grows, it is a cycle believers have seen before. While no one celebrates their religious freedom coming under attack, God has used this persecution to great effect throughout history. Over the centuries, there have been...

Dealing Effectively with the Dynamics of Change

Dealing Effectively with the Dynamics of Change

Change can be challenging. Some people look forward to change and embrace it. Some people dread change and try to avoid it. Since change is inevitable, so here are some of the dynamics surrounding change and the specific strategies to deal with change more...

God’s Holy Interruption Is Coming Soon

God’s Holy Interruption Is Coming Soon

This past weekend I preached at The Roads Church, a charismatic congregation located in the tiny town of Norris City, Illinois. Located amid cornfields, the population is only 1,325, but almost that many people visit the church on weekends. They come from all over...

Pin It on Pinterest

[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]