2 Reasons to Wait to Have Sex After Marriage

by | Jan 15, 2015 | Woman

I remembered why I decided to wait to have sex as I listened to a podcast from Andy Stanley this morning on my way home from dropping off children at school.

“I’m not the appetizer, I’m the dessert.”

If we start off loaning our bodies, who is going to wait around for the main meal?

We ordered Olive Garden to-go last night and I had one of my favorite cheat meals—chicken alfredo and breadsticks with alfredo dipping sauce and an extra tub of alfredo sauce to heat up the leftovers the next day. Mmmmm … I was full and stuffed and happy. Deliriously-food-coma happy.

But I wasn’t completely satisfied. All the savory goodness was amazing, but I needed something sweet to finish it off. A bit of dark chocolate would have taken the cake … but there was NONE.

Justin ate it.

My marriage is like that. Dating Justin was the appetizer … good for a short amount of time, but I was excited to have the main meal with him. I wanted an entire lifetime. We’ve been married for almost 11 years, together for 13, and that man still gives me butterflies. He makes me strive to a better person and he is my teammate, partner, best friend and so much more.

But God knew that wasn’t enough.

So He throws a little dessert into the mix.

The dessert is exceptional.

It completes the meal.

Andy said he’s heard hundreds and hundreds of stories that follow this pattern … sex is introduced way too early, hearts are broken, and countless women are left wondering why they’re hurt when they gave everything they had.

I didn’t have amazing self-esteem growing up. I wasn’t a Daddy’s girl. I was plain-looking, mousy-haired, dressed in hand-me-downs that were popular three years before I wore them. I was quiet, a reader and invisible.

So why did I think I was worth waiting for? What was it that made me think I wasn’t just the appetizer?

I’ve always believed that God means what He says. He said to wait, so I did. I always figured that if sex was as great as the students in my high school and my college roommate thought it was, that it would be even better if I waited. That God had a blessing in store if you did things His way.

There are many reasons to wait until you’re married to have sex, but here’s two at the top of the list:

1. God said to wait.

2. You’re worth waiting for.

You’re worth sticking around for.

You. Are. Worth. It.

Come in real close, because I have a secret to tell you.

When you’re married, you get to have dessert first.

National speaker Bethany Jett is an award-winning writer, whose first attempt at writing a book proposal landed her Writer of the Year at the 2012 Florida Christian Writers Conference, a contract with the MacGregor Literary Agency, and a publishing deal. Her book, The Cinderella Rule, was a finalist for the 2014 Selah Awards.

Bethany is a video contributor for christianmingle.com, web editor for Splickety magazine, a featured columnist with Choose NOW Ministries, and has been interviewed on radio stations nationwide and internationally. Her writing can be found in Gospel Roads magazine, sonomachristianhome.com, christianitytoday.com, spiritledwoman.com and crosswalk.com, along with other magazines and sites.

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