The night I met my husband, Danny Lotz, I was 17 years old
and had just graduated from high school. Danny had been raised in a
strong Christian home by a father who was a pastor of a small church in
New York City.
Danny had received Jesus Christ as a young boy at his
dad’s church and had taken a strong, uncompromising stand for his faith
since then. He was a young girl’s dream, and 15 months later we were
married in the same mountain chapel where my parents had married 23
We moved into a small house, and at 18 years of age, when
my friends were well into their college studies and planning their
careers, I was grocery shopping, cooking, mopping and decorating, as
well as working part time. It was wonderful!
Ten years later, we moved to a city where Danny practiced
dentistry full time. By then, we had three children, and I did volunteer
work and taught a weekly Bible class that was attended by 500 women.
Without my noticing it, the busyness had overtaken me, and
I awoke one morning to the realization that I was in a marriage in
which the love had run out! I will never forget the panicked, trapped
feeling I had as I knelt in prayer, desperately pleading with the Lord
If you feel trapped in a marriage where the love has run
out, praise God! There is hope for you just as there was hope for me.
The first step in starting over is to invite Jesus into your marriage.
Jesus Was Invited to a Wedding
John has given us glorious eyewitness testimony of the
identity of Jesus Christ. Yet that identity was limited by Jesus’
humanity, which was like a house of curtains, veiling His deity.
However, when He performed miracles or taught the truth, it was as
though the curtains parted and the glory streamed through.
What a simple yet profound blessing it is to know that the
first time the “curtains” parted and Jesus’ glory was revealed was in a
home as He celebrated a wedding! At the very start of His public
ministry, the One who formed man and breathed His own life into him, the
Son of God, was invited to a wedding. And He accepted the invitation!
(See John 2:1-2.)
If you need a miracle in your marriage, invite Jesus into
the relationship. You will be blessed by the knowledge that He is there
when unexpected problems and crises arise.
Jesus Was Informed of the Crisis
During the first century, when Israel was under Roman
occupation, there was little cause for celebration. A wedding created an
exception in that oppressive atmosphere.
It was to such a celebration in Cana of Galilee that
Jesus, His disciples and His mother were invited. And it was during such
a festive occasion that a crisis occurred—the wine ran out (see John
In that culture and time, running out of wine would cause
the newlyweds such humiliation that they would never be able to lift
their heads in public again. This was a marriage in trouble almost from
the moment it began.
Has the “wine”—that spirited, sparkling liquid that
symbolizes passionate, affectionate love—run out of your marriage? The
loss of love can occur gradually, similar to the way I expect that the
wine ran out at the wedding in Cana—one glass at a time until it was
When Mary learned of the crisis, she immediately informed Jesus, “
‘They have no more wine’” (John 2:3, NIV). The crisis was stated simply,
without explanations or suggestions about how He might fix the problem.
Although kind and respectful, Jesus’ response to Mary
gives the impression that He doesn’t intend to do anything about the
problem (see John 2:4). Sometimes Jesus’ answer addresses not only the
specific need we have brought to His attention but also something
Apparently Mary wanted to solve the problem for the young
couple, but she also had a hidden agenda (see John 2:4). She thought
this wedding celebration would be a wonderful place for Jesus to begin
letting people know who He was.
Are there hidden agendas in your prayers? Are you praying
for God to save your marriage to avoid being humiliated or rendered
financially devastated by divorce, instead of striving to glorify Him?
Jesus understands the feelings associated with our trials, but
glorifying God should be our bottom-line agenda.
Mary may not have known and understood everything, but she
knew Jesus cared. And she knew that in order for Him to have the
freedom to make a difference, she would have to place total control of
the situation in His hands.
Jesus Was Invested With Full Authority
After speaking with Jesus, Mary called the servants and
instructed them: “ ‘Do whatever He tells you’” (John 2:5). She was
confident Jesus could make a difference in the crisis.
Have you placed your marriage and your situation under His
authority? Maybe one reason He has allowed you to be in your present
crisis is to bring you to the point of complete submission to His will.
I believe that’s what happened in my life. I remember
getting up early one morning, slipping down on my knees and tearfully
asking God once more how I could fix my relationship with Danny.
I opened my Bible to 1 John 4. As I meditated, God began
to give me specific instructions on what to do.