Dad, What Is a Good Way to Connect With Your Daughter?

by | Sep 18, 2014 | Man

How do you connect with your daughter?

Earlier this year, some research came out of Baylor University with some powerful insights for fathers. The researchers found that the best bonding times for dads and daughters—and what often become positive turning points in those relationships—are shared activities.

Take note, dad. When asked about moments when they really felt connected to their dads, daughters commonly mentioned the time when they began to play a sport. Their dads quickly jumped in and became the primary practice partner. And it’s natural for dads to stay involved to help their daughters develop skills and learn lessons about competition, taking risks, and standing up for themselves.

Most of all, when dads made the effort to help coach or work on the skill with them, it made the daughters feel important—the center of their dad’s attention.

To be clear, this isn’t all about sports. Other shared activities daughters mentioned include working on a project and taking a trip together. Those experiences helped them feel connected to their dads. And often, spending that time together led to great conversations about all kinds of subjects.

Now, here’s what I believe is even more interesting about this. The professor at Baylor noted that these shared activities tap into the masculine style of building closeness. Guys often relate more easily while doing things together (side-by-side), where the feminine approach is more about connecting by talking, (face-to-face).

Allow me to challenge you here, dad. The fact that your daughter is probably willing to do activities and sports and work on projects with you is a good thing. Maybe without knowing it, she’s accommodating your male communication style.

But let’s not look at this study, say, “That’s cool,” and quickly move on with life as we know it. It’s pretty clear that daughters enjoy those activities with their dads because they get more access to him, and the activities lead to more open communication.

So, if they are willing to come over into our world a little bit, shouldn’t we be eager to do the same? Those one-on-one, face-to-face conversations our daughters thrive on might not be easy for many of us, but aren’t our girls worth the effort?

So look for more opportunities to do things with your daughter. If she isn’t into sports, maybe join a club or take a class. Start a hobby together. The study mentioned one dad who took singing lessons so he could be in a school talent show with his daughter. I’m sure she was glowing when they performed.

And for those of you who don’t have a daughter, keep using that side-by-side approach with your sons also. It’s when you’re doing things together that the real bonding occurs.

So, dads of daughters, what has worked for you? What special activities do you share with your daughter? Please leave a comment below.

Action Points for Dads on the Journey

  • Ask your child what sport or other activity he or she would like to do together—or learn together. Then make plans to do it, even if it requires you to stretch and learn something new.
  • Put a regular one-on-one outing on your calendar with each of your children. You’ll be surprised how much they open up when it’s just the two of you.
  • What project can you take on with your child? Try to find one that interests her, and then tackle it together.
  • Plan a trip with your child to do something fun—whether it’s for a few nights or just for an afternoon. Or make arrangements to take him or her with you on a business trip.
  • Are face-to-face conversations with your child difficult for you? Don’t hesitate to get help from conversation-starter decks (like this one or this one) or something like The Communication Game for Dads and Daughters.

Carey Casey is the CEO of the National Center for Fathering, a nonprofit organization seeking to improve the lives of children and establish a positive fathering and family legacy that will impact future generations by inspiring and equipping fathers and father figures to be actively engaged in the life of every child.

For the original article, visit fathers.com.

CHARISMA NEWSLETTERS

Stay up-to-date with current issues, Christian teachings, entertainment news, videos & more.

The latest breaking Christian news you need to know about as soon as it happens.

Prophetic messages from respected leaders & news of how God is moving throughout the world. 


MORE FROM CHARISMA

Are Domestic Missions as Important as International Missions?

Are Domestic Missions as Important as International Missions?

Huntington, Indiana, is a small town that is witnessing a revival stirring within the youth. For 10 days, I was able to witness this firsthand by the opportunity to lead a trip to this town to serve with six other college girls. During this time, I saw how the Lord...

8 Ways You Can Attract God’s Full Attention

8 Ways You Can Attract God’s Full Attention

We all want God’s attention, right? The best way to get His attention is to give Him our full attention, and pay close attention to what attracts Him. There are certain attitudes and actions which attract God and others that repel Him. We want to create an atmosphere...

What the Holy Spirit Showed Me About the Fentanyl Overdose Crisis

What the Holy Spirit Showed Me About the Fentanyl Overdose Crisis

Fentanyl has been making headlines lately in the midst of an overdose crisis raging in America. Doubtless, if we don’t shut this down in the spirit, this overdose crisis will soon find its way into many other nations. Fentanyl is a powerful synthetic opioid similar to...

Could Judas Have Been Saved?

Could Judas Have Been Saved?

The answer is yes. If Judas would have simply repented to God, he could have been saved. The Bible tells us that everyone can be saved. Judas knew he had sinned but he didn’t bring it to God. A person can feel remorse within themselves, but not remorse for sinning...

Anne Graham Lotz: One Kingdom Truth That Will Never Change

Anne Graham Lotz: One Kingdom Truth That Will Never Change

Out of respect for those of you who have taken the time to comment about a statement I made 11 years ago regarding the World Economic Forum, I thought it would be beneficial to restate God’s call on my life. In 1988, He made it clear that I was to be His messenger,...

RECENT ARTICLES

Spirit-Filled Pastor: Only Pulpits Have the Power to Change America

One thing is crystal clear in America: If we truly want change, we must re-spark biblical boldness and flame the fires of biblical action. If we won't fight, then spiritually speaking, we will fade...
A Big Excuse That Shuts Down Our Ability to Hear from God

A Big Excuse That Shuts Down Our Ability to Hear from God

One of the biggest excuses we have is that we somehow feel God doesn’t speak to us. This excuse shuts down our ability to hear from Him, trust Him and surrender to Him. All three things are integral when we are trying to change our habits, lose weight, get healthy and...

How Do You Leave a Church That Becomes Toxic?

How Do You Leave a Church That Becomes Toxic?

Two weeks ago, I shared several practical guidelines on how to leave a church gracefully. I wrote this because I hear so many stories about people storming out of churches because their feelings got hurt. But one astute reader didn’t appreciate my observations because...

Prophetic Word: There Will Be a Day of Reckoning

Prophetic Word: There Will Be a Day of Reckoning

“Behold, the day of the LORD comes, cruel, with both wrath and fierce anger, to lay the land desolate; and He will destroy its sinners from it. For the stars of heaven and their constellations will not give their light; the sun will be darkened in its going forth, and...

8 Reasons for You to Speak in Tongues

8 Reasons for You to Speak in Tongues

If a person were to ask, “Why speak in tongues?” couldn’t we also ask, “Why pray?” The Word of God shows a definite value in praying with an unknown tongue. Jesus tells us that “it is necessary always to pray” (Luke 18:1, MEV). Later, in speaking of prayer, Paul...

Pin It on Pinterest

[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]
[class^="wpforms-"]