In Your Journey Through Grief, You’ll Never Walk Alone

by | May 31, 2019 | Spirit-Led Living

They say you’re never supposed to start a story with “The phone rang,” but the phone did ring, waking me from an exhausted sleep at 2:00 a.m. My husband’s son had stayed with him at the hospital to allow me a few hours at home. Now I heard this voice say, “You need to come to the hospital.”

And after three hours, I returned home a widow.

Nothing can fully prepare you for the experience of grief. Even if your loved one’s death was not a complete surprise, your world has shockingly changed forever. Your life, your thoughts, your time, your belongings, your emotions, your daily routine, your faith—suddenly they all feel foreign. It can be difficult to even recognize yourself. What do you do now?

The reality of grief you find yourself in is almost never what you thought it would be like. Your world has been ruptured in a way you never could have anticipated. A part of you is gone. Maybe it feels like all of you is gone!

You might wish you could wake up from this nightmare and discover it was just a dream. But that isn’t possible.

“Grief is a journey.” I heard and read that statement many times in the early days after my husband’s death, and I hated the idea. I didn’t want to go on a journey! I wanted someone to tell me what to do. I wanted someone to know how to get through this quickly, how to stop hurting, how to do grief “right” so I wouldn’t keep struggling. With billions of people having lost loved ones in this world, surely someone, somewhere had figured it out and could tell me what I needed to know.

But no one could tell me, and no one can tell you either. No one had your relationship with your loved one. No one felt quite the same love, dysfunction, joy, quirkiness, humor, tension, security, pain or longing that characterized your relationship with your spouse, child, parent, sibling or best friend. Yes, others have experienced all those emotions. But no one has experienced them the way you have. Your relationship was unique, and your grief will be unique as well.

The morning I arrived home from the hospital a widow, I sat down with a cup of coffee and my Bible. I opened it to 1 Corinthians 15, Paul’s treatise on death and resurrection. I felt lost. My head had known that barring an unusual miracle, this day would come, and I did not doubt God would be there for me. But my heart desperately needed a touch point, something to hold on to. That day and in the weeks and months that followed, I desperately wished for God to take away the pain. I wanted God to magically bring me out of the valley of grief and make me all OK again.

He didn’t. And He probably won’t for you either. Death hurts. It’s supposed to hurt.

But I discovered something that is more powerful than the relief of pain. I discovered that hope and pain can coexist. That’s one of the biggest differences about grief for the believer. The sting of death hurts just as bad. The loss is as great. Your heart is as raw and bleeding as anyone else’s. You are as confused, overwhelmed and exhausted as anyone could be. You feel like part of you, half of you, all of you is ripped away.

Yet at the same time, sometimes in the very same instant, you have hope—a hope rising from somewhere deep in your soul that even death cannot take away or tarnish. It’s a hope that says, “I know that I know that I know this is not the end,” even when everything around you looked and feels like it’s the end. It’s a hope that believes everything your senses are telling you in the darkest moments are not the whole story.

Your faith may be shaken with the death of your loved one, and allowing Jesus to “go there” with you may seem impossible right now. You may have some deep questions to wrestle over with God as you move along this journey. You may feel angry at Him. None of that is a surprise to Him or makes Him love you any less. His shoulders are big enough to carry you regardless of how long or convoluted your grief journey is or may become. He’s still inviting you to “go there” and to allow Him to go there with you.

Journey GriefAdapted from The Christian’s Journey through Grief by Carol Peters-Tanksley, copyright 2019, published by Charisma House. Death is a part of life, and everyone experiences the loss of a loved one at one time or another. This book will help you understand and embrace the process with the hope that only a Christian can have. To order your copy, click on this link.

Prayer Power for the Week of June 2, 2019

This week, continue to pray for our nation and its leaders as they tackle issues that affect us and the world. Pray for the protection of our allies and for our president to have godly wisdom, counsel, direction, protection and strength to persevere in the face of overwhelming challenges. Read 2 Chronicles 7;14, 1 Corinthians 15, 1 Thessalonians 4:13.

For more of Dr. Carol’s lessons about her grief journey, listen to the podcast included with this article.

CHARISMA NEWSLETTERS

Stay up-to-date with current issues, Christian teachings, entertainment news, videos & more.

The latest breaking Christian news you need to know about as soon as it happens.

Prophetic messages from respected leaders & news of how God is moving throughout the world. 


MORE FROM CHARISMA

Declaring a Great Awakening Among Prodigals

Declaring a Great Awakening Among Prodigals

Read Time: 1 Minute 23 Seconds It’s a shocking statistic! More than 80 and up to 90% of children who grow up in church are leaving the church once they reach 18. Sadly, only 40% return, according to Focus on the Family. I believe, with prayer, we can defy those...

Bible Verse of the Day, Dec. 8th: Advent Season, Isaiah 11:1-10

Bible Verse of the Day, Dec. 8th: Advent Season, Isaiah 11:1-10

Isaiah 11:1-10 And there shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, and a Branch shall grow out of his roots. The Spirit of the Lord shall rest upon him, the Spirit of wisdom and understanding, the Spirit of counsel and might, the Spirit of knowledge and of the...

Marilyn Hickey: God Can Heal Your Emotional Wounds

Marilyn Hickey: God Can Heal Your Emotional Wounds

Read Time: 2 Minutes 2 Seconds Have you ever broken a bone? If so, you know what it’s like to go through a painful healing process. Consider what that might feel like in the spiritual realm. Sometimes we can get broken in various ways in life, but God wants to “set”...

COGIC Bishop Derrick Hutchins Sr. Dies at 65

COGIC Bishop Derrick Hutchins Sr. Dies at 65

Read Time: 1 Minute 59 Seconds Bishop J. Drew Sheard and the General Board of the Eastern Florida Ecclesiastical Jurisdiction of the Church of God in Christ announced Tuesday the death of one of its most beloved leaders, Bishop Derrick Hutchins Sr. Hutchins was 65....

Don’t Criticize Charismatics

Don’t Criticize Charismatics

They are saying the charismatic movement is divisive. Whenever people get involved in the "new emphasis," there are disruptions in the status quo. Red flags go up. Lines are drawn. I would ask: What else could be expected? Any force as great as this is bound to make...

Jonathan Cahn Reveals the Mystery of the Molten Beast

Jonathan Cahn Reveals the Mystery of the Molten Beast

Read Time: 6 Minutes, 42 Seconds Is it possible that ancient entities known as "the gods" have returned to our world? Could these gods actually be the unseen movers and catalysts of what's happening in America and the world today? Could they lie behind the current...

RECENT ARTICLES

Prophecy: God is Raising Up Reformers in the Church with Alexander Pagani

Read Time: 1 minute 30 seconds Do you feel called to speak truth and bring reform to the current church model? We are approaching 2023 and apostle Alexander Pagani says next year he believes God...
Shining the Light of Jesus in Hollywood’s Darkness

Shining the Light of Jesus in Hollywood’s Darkness

Read Time: 3 Minutes 37 Seconds Most made-for-TV Christmas movies are like eggnog and sugar cookies—way too sweet, yet extremely addictive for a lot of viewers. But these Hallmark-style movies—the ones with predictable love stories that always end with jingling bells...

Prophecy: Goodness Is Following You, Turn and See

Prophecy: Goodness Is Following You, Turn and See

Read Time: 1 Minute 51 Seconds At a recent gathering where a member was struggling, I heard and declared by the Spirit of the Lord, “Goodness is following you, TURN and see; embrace His goodness in this moment and watch the shift!” There was an immediate shift and...

Man Who Spent 23 Minutes in Hell: You Came From God

Man Who Spent 23 Minutes in Hell: You Came From God

Read Time: 2 Minutes 25 Seconds If you search the phrase, “where does life come from?” the first explanation reads: “The origin of life is a result of a supernatural event—and readily arises from nonliving matter in short periods of time, today as in the past.” The...

Raise Your Praise!

Raise Your Praise!

These are the days that may leave you feeling defeated. You may be wondering when these present trials will end or how can you strengthen your faith for the battle as you wrestle against powers and principalities that come against you, in addition to the challenges...

Pin It on Pinterest