Once Gay, Always Gay?

by | Oct 10, 2012 | Blogs, Fire in My Bones

A new law in California tells gay teens it’s impossible to change their sexual orientation. But what if they want to change?

I have a confession to make: I have prayed for many people who struggle with homosexual feelings, and I have asked the Holy Spirit to help them overcome those urges. According to the state of California, that makes me a criminal if the person I prayed for was under 18.

California has banned so-called “reparative therapy,” which is used to cure minors of their homosexual feelings. Upon signing the law in late September, Gov. Jerry Brown said such psychological counseling has led to depression and suicide among gay youth, and he added that any therapy aimed at changing a person’s sexual orientation falls into the category of “quackery.”

The law states that no mental health provider can provide minors with therapies to “change behaviors or gender expressions, or to eliminate or reduce sexual or romantic attractions or feelings toward individuals of the same sex.”

Brown, the majority of California’s legislators and leaders of the gay community say it’s hateful to offer a gay person alternatives if they struggle with same-sex attraction. They believe if young people have gay feelings, they might as well embrace their homosexual identity and get busy acting it out. (Meanwhile, a formerly gay student and two therapists have filed suit against the law, claiming that it is a violation of free speech and freedom of religion.)

We all know homosexuality is a complicated issue, and it requires loads of compassion and sensitivity. I will readily admit the Christian community hasn’t always shown love to homosexuals. But as we develop genuine compassion there are three truths we must never compromise:

1. Homosexuality is not necessarily inborn. The prevailing view in the mainstream psychological community is that if a person feels gay attraction, those feelings permanently define him/her. Change isn’t possible, supposedly, because all homosexuals are “born that way.”

Yet any honest psychologist knows certain factors can trigger gay feelings. I have prayed for many guys, for example, who were haunted by unwanted gay desires because they were sexually abused as children or teens. I have also prayed for women who developed sexual feelings for women after being abused by men; for them, lesbianism provided protection from the men who hurt them.

Some boys develop same-sex feelings because they lack a father figure. A boy’s craving for his absent or distant dad’s affection can lead to sexualization of other men in his life. To ignore such environmental or developmental factors is a gross denial of the obvious. To tell a teenage boy that he must automatically embrace gay feelings—especially when his sexuality is still being developed—is a worse form of quackery than Brown has condemned.

2. The Holy Spirit can heal our broken sexuality. I have known many people who struggled with various levels of homosexual desire before they met Christ—and many who continue to resist those temptations as Christians. Some were in long-term gay relationships; some simply experimented with homosexuality; others got hooked on gay porn. But in every case they found freedom from those urges through honest confession, repentance and healing prayer.

If a young man came to me and admitted he was tempted to seduce women, I would not tell him: “You just have a strong sex drive. Go ahead and have sex with as many girls as you want! That’s just who you are!” That would be crazy. If this teen really wanted to change his behavior I would lead him in a prayer of repentance, deal with the root issues of his problem and encourage him to trust Jesus for the grace to exercise self-control. Why wouldn’t I do the same for a teenager who is attracted to the same sex?

3. Many homosexual strugglers want freedom. Supporters of the California law would probably say I’m being “hateful” if I prayed for a young person who wanted to overcome same-sex urges. But I could turn the argument around and accuse the psychological community of hate because they are not giving gay people any options. Wouldn’t it be more loving to ask a person what they want instead of imposing a lifestyle on them?

One of the most basic truths of Christianity is that Jesus gives us a new nature when we experience conversion.  This is the miracle the apostle Paul described in 2 Corinthians 5:17: “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come” (NASB). Why would we offer that freedom to those who struggle with other forms of sin or brokenness, but not to those who want to be free from homosexuality?

Let’s stop being naive. California’s tyrannical law is not based on science or solid psychological theory. It is mean-spirited intolerance, and it will become federal policy if defenders of religious freedom don’t challenge it.

J. Lee Grady is the former editor of Charisma and the director of The Mordecai Project. You can follow him on Twitter at leegrady. His recent books include 10 Lies Men Believe and Fearless Daughters of the Bible.

CHARISMA NEWSLETTERS

Stay up-to-date with current issues, Christian teachings, entertainment news, videos & more.

The latest breaking Christian news you need to know about as soon as it happens.

Prophetic messages from respected leaders & news of how God is moving throughout the world. 


MORE FROM CHARISMA

Satanic Worship Headlines Grammys

Satanic Worship Headlines Grammys

Surrounded by dancers with long black hair cloaked in red robes, English singer Sam Smith was center stage at the Grammys glorifying satanic rituals in a skin tight leather outfit as he sang "Unholy." Smith identifies as non-binary. His performance at the Grammys...

A Pastor’s Grace Shines After Carjacking

A Pastor’s Grace Shines After Carjacking

Parenting is not easy, and living in these tech-heavy times bring unique challenges unlike any other generation before it. Yet core, biblical principles do not change with the times, and ensuring a child is held accountable for their wrongdoing is paramount to...

Messianic Rabbi: For Crying Out Loud

Messianic Rabbi: For Crying Out Loud

The crossing of the Red Sea is one of the most powerful and miraculous events that we read about in the Bible. Just thinking about the millions of Israelites and the mixed multitude walking up to the sea with the Egyptian army chasing them. They had just experienced...

The Lord Says, ‘Don’t Speak Words of Self-Sabotage’

The Lord Says, ‘Don’t Speak Words of Self-Sabotage’

One of the most important things a Christian can learn is that our God is a God who speaks. He wants us to know we can hear His voice. Prophecy is the basis for an on-going relationship with God. It deepens our walk and releases God’s power in the earth. Here is a...

The Foul Smell of Rot From Washington DC

The Foul Smell of Rot From Washington DC

One of the enduring conceits of our time is that we still have a semi-functioning two-party system in American politics. Most people still don't believe their lying eyes. They can smell the rot in Washington, DC, as far away as Sitka, Alaska. But they have been so...

How Believers Can Work Together to Restore Pre-COVID America

How Believers Can Work Together to Restore Pre-COVID America

On April 16, 2021, I traveled to Tulsa, Oklahoma, at the request of a local business leader, Clay Clark. He asked me to speak at a conference focused on ending the COVID lockdowns. Clay is a business coach and entrepreneur who'd seen his clients' businesses devastated...

What Is Your Prophetic Warning?

What Is Your Prophetic Warning?

God wants to anoint you with His grace through your unique prophetic wiring to impact the body of Christ in the place He has called you! He will do that in as many diverse ways as there are people, personalities, and gift mixes across the face of the earth. I cannot...

RECENT ARTICLES

The Lord Says, ‘It’s Payback Time’

If you’ve been following any of my recent posts, you’re probably aware that my husband and I are selling the property we’ve lived on for the past 21 years and buying a ranch. Interestingly, we have...
Is America Destined to Become Like Sodom and Gomorrah?

Is America Destined to Become Like Sodom and Gomorrah?

Sodom and Gomorrah were real cities and real people lived there. These were notoriously sinful cities that God warned but eventually destroyed because of their wickedness (Gen. 19:24). These cities, infamous for their debauchery and homosexuality, are mentioned 23...

How to Get Rid of Guilt Forever

How to Get Rid of Guilt Forever

Are you bugged by a guilty conscience … carrying around baggage from a certain mistake or decision that produces feelings of regret or even self-loathing? We’ve all said or done things that we wish we could take back. And while it’s completely natural to grieve over a...

Pin It on Pinterest